Amber Chia Has An Equation For The Perfect Lifeby Amber Chia
Posted on 11 April 2013
I was at Ashton’s school today for his six monthly progress report. His teacher is pleased with his progress. He has improved in a lot of areas although he is still very active and naughty.
Sometimes, Ashton does something naughty on purpose to test us but I still enjoy motherhood. He brings me a lot of fun and happiness. I just had a photo shoot session at a studio with Ashton when he turned two and a half years old and the photos turned up really beautiful. I want to have loads of photos of Ashton growing up for remembrance because I do not have many photos of myself in my childhood. Besides, my little darling is growing up so fast. Ashton is getting good at posing for the camera. He loves being in the limelight and enjoys attending functions and walking the runway. It is quite obvious that he is a performer, he likes being the centre of attention. I shall be very supportive if he should decide to take up modelling or acting when he is old enough.
When Ashton was two years old, he just did whatever he wanted to do for the experience. He will drop objects even though he knew he was not supposed to do it. Now that he is two and a half years old, his emotions get slightly better. Every time he wants to throw something, he will say “Mommy says cannot throw”. He is like reminding himself of what I have told him. It means he understands what we teach him. It is very funny – Ashton talking to himself. This morning as we were leaving for his school, he saw my supplements and said, “This Mommy one, Ashton cannot touch. Only Mommy can touch. Mommy things cannot touch”. I am so happy that he has reached this milestone.
He is Mommy’s son you know…STILL. He sticks to me the most. Every morning, he comes up to my room by himself and wakes me up. He only wants me to send him to school. Sometimes, when I was really tired and asked my husband to send him, he insisted, “I don’t want Papa send, I want Mommy send”. So, Mommy “Die Die” also had to send him to school. I am his dedicated chauffeur! But I enjoy the trips to school with him you know. He tells me lots of things - what he dreamt last night, what he did, etc. On the way back from school, he will give me a detail rundown of his school activities. I am so happy to be able to share his childhood journey. It is amazing how fast he is learning.
There was this one incident that Ashton’s attachment to me made me cry. I was going to work one evening when Ashton pleaded with me to stay at home with him. When I explained to him that I needed to work to pay for his milk and Angry Bird toys, he said, “I don’t want milk milk. I just want Mommy stay with me. I don’t want anything. I only want Mommy”. I was so touched that my tears just rolled down once I was in my car. I knew that he wants me to spend more time with him. Children are children you know because the very next day when I woke up, he asked me to buy him a new Angry Bird toy!
The first ang pow that Ashton got this Chinese New Year was from one of my friends. He only opened the ang pow when we got into the car as I had taught him that it is not good manners to open ang pows in the presence of the giver. The ang pow had a RM100 piece inside. I asked him to pass the money to me for safekeeping but he refused. I tried to exchange RM2 with the RM100 ringgit piece but he adamantly held on to his RM100 piece. It was then that I realized Ashton knew the value of the money he had! I kept badgering him until he told me, “I don’t want to give Mommy money, I want to buy milk milk, I want to buy Angry Birds. I dont want Mommy go to work anymore”. That night I couldn’t sleep. I was like, “Oh, my son is a big boy already! He doesn’t want to give me the money because he doesn’t want me to go to work. And he wants to use the money to buy his own milk and Angry Bird toys”. So you know, that was the second time I wish I could stop work and spend more time with him.
I actually tried devoting all my time to Ashton for a few days during the recent one-week school holidays. It did not really work out well. I enjoyed being with my little darling but at the same time, I missed my work. I had this feeling of being incomplete. For me, the equation to the perfect life is little Ashton plus my family plus my work plus my friends. I realized that I cannot give Ashton happiness when I am not happy with myself. Surprisingly, Ashton also discovered he needed his own space. On the fourth day of our togetherness, he told me, “Mommy I want to play, don’t come here, go away”. So for me, loving someone does not mean having to be with the person for 24 hours a day. Being a full time mother is not being the best mother. Being a good mommy is of course educating him, at least spending a few hours of quality time with him daily to listen and talk to him. You know if I keep loving him only and not loving myself, not being able to pursue my dreams, I will not be totally happy. I am sure Ashton doesn’t want to see his Mommy not 100 per cent happy as well.
Ashton enjoys himself when we go out with my friends. He is a PR guy. He loves talking to my friends. Ashton likes experiencing new things and exploring new places. Every weekend, I try to take him to new places. You know, we have been to all the fun places for kids in Kuala Lumpur so I have to look for places further away. We were at A’Famosa Resort Melaka two weeks ago just for a holiday. I was very tired after the three days holiday because I was treading water with him most of the time. Ashton got sunburnt as it was really, really hot. We are planning a trip to Legoland at the end of this month. I believe all mothers are the same. We go to places, not because we, mothers want to go. We go for the children’s sake. Actually I don’t enjoy playing in the water in the hot sun but I do it because Ashton loves it. I just want to see the smile on his face.
I just launched my book last week. The title is “Guide to a successful modelling career”. Ashton was there to support me. He is kind of like my best friend. He accompanies me everywhere, giving me support always. He is the one who brings me all the happiness and bliss.
Two days ago, I posted a photo of Ashton wearing my hat and playing with my students. They put on some make-up for him, he looked so funny. What more can I ask for - I am pretty lucky having Ashton.
The other day, my friend visited us with his five month old baby. I did not know until then that Ashton loves babies. He was so excited and happy, “Mommy, baby hug. I want baby. I don’t want baby go home”. Hmmm…it is time to have another baby. I discovered that he knows how to take care of the baby. He did not treat the baby like a toy. He just “sayang” the baby you know. Whenever the baby smiled, he would go all mushy mushy’ “Baby smile!” and he would “sayang” and kiss the baby. He treats toys as a toys, throwing them around but with the baby, he knows how to be gentle and caring. You know he just loves the baby.
Of course during Chinese New Year, we had a lot of fun. We visited my father-in-law and my parents. My friends also came round to my place. Most of them are married with kids so we just sat chit chatting whilst watching our new generation play.
What I can say is that Ashton is a strong boy - he does not get bullied. He is the tough guy amongst the kids. I remember the day my friend brought his five year old son to my house and voiced his concern that his son would bully Ashton as he was always fighting with other kids. What actually happened was his son ended up being the one who cried. They fought over a ball. Ashton defended himself with “He took MY ball. It is MY ball!” Ashton is a toughie, he can take on a kid twice his age!
I hope though that he won’t get into too much trouble in school. Sometimes he had to stand in the corner for being naughty. The teacher told me he has improved though. He can remind himself not to be naughty, “Teacher say cannot fight, cannot push people, Ashton will stand in the corner”. At this age, he has started talking to himself - reminding himself about what he can and cannot do. It is really funny. At home, he will say, “Mommy say cannot play with water” and puts the bottle of water he had taken from the fridge back in. Then he informs me, “Mommy, Ashton didn’t play with water”.
Ashton likes to sing now, on his own. He looks adorable when he sings in the house. He sings and dances in his T-shirt and underwear as soon as he wakes up. He is very funny and sooo cute.
Five Little Monkeys
Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars
See You On Monday
Oppa Gangnam Style
I hope to conceive a baby this year. I hope it will be a baby girl. It will be my dream come true and I can stop at two children.
I simply enjoy motherhood! I pray that Ashton will continue to be as healthy and happy as he is now. He is always so cheerful, greeting everyone. He brings joy to people. My staff and students always tell me to bring Ashton to the Academy. He is so much fun to play with.
Mother’s Day will be celebrated next month. I want to wish all mothers Happy Mother’s Day in advance. Enjoy motherhood like I do. When you recall all those funny moments, they are all happiness and joy. Like the few stories that I shared, good or bad, being a mother is a blessing to me. When you enjoy motherhood, you will be happy and your child will be happy as well so give all the happiness to your child and your child will bring all the happiness to people.
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