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A Course in Professional Juggling (something all Moms already do)

But we’re talking about EXPERT level here. All Moms be it Stay-At-Home-Moms, Work-From-Home-Moms or Traditional Working Moms, juggle. It is only a matter of juggling 2 balls or 3 or 4 or quantity X, but how many can juggle with the accompanying cool stunts? How many employed working Moms juggle work and family WITHOUT a babysitter, maid nor Nanny, nor any help at all from anyone? How many Moms are employed and have a real BOSS at work to answer to yet still care for kids FULL TIME? It is literally having TWO jobs with TWO bosses, and a lot of demands.

Impossible?

Well, I’m doing it right now.

My last post saw me deciding about accepting a job offer that would upset my status quo. I’ve literally jumped into the deep end because they needed me urgently and offered to employ me on my terms, which meant my 21 month old toddler got to stay with me wherever I went, and I get to work from home and go to the office only when necessary (with baby). This is all fine and dandy if I had a Nanny to entertain my toddler whilst I work, but I don’t, and finding one doesn’t happen overnight.

So how have I been coping? Just imagine yourselves at the office in the morning: you’ll probably have your morning coffee and do a quick scan of the headlines before answering your stream of emails and start making some phone calls, attend some meetings, then work on some proposals and other documentation depending on the nature of your work, but imagine all this and then having to care for kids as well; which means to feed them, entertain them, put them to bed, clean them and stop them from fighting! Never mind the mess, laundry or the dishes in the sink. That can all come later after they’re in bed.

I’m proud to announce that I am coping, and even managing to fit in an exercise routine, and although things have been SUPER CRAZY, I am doing it with a smile and thanking God with a million bows that this will all stop once my Nanny arrives in June.

I am basically a smashed, beat up Metro bus in denial.

Professional Mommy Juggling – Expert Level

Food Responsibilities

1. Plan the menu (and that includes all meals) for the week before hand so you can get all your groceries accordingly, and won’t have to waste time pondering what to cook.
2. If you have grocery items that will perish and you know you won’t be able to use it within the week, freeze them. Even vegetables can be frozen if you do them the proper way.
3. Cook in bulk and freeze for emergency days when there is just no time to cook. I usually cook double meals so we eat one meal and freeze the other to be eaten a few days down the line or for the next week.
4. Peel an entire batch of garlic and onions for the week and store them in an air tight container in the fridge. It will save a hell of a lot of time!
5. Keep the menu simple with one dish meals – pasta, stews, jambalaya, crock pot meals with rice.
6. Teach toddlers how to self feed so they are independent from feeding which takes up even more of your time. It is a messy affair to start but something well worth pursuing, and of course, you will still get mess, but at least you get your 20 minutes to finish off that urgent email.
7. Prepare children’s snacks for school the night before. Prepare toddler’s snacks also the night before because you never know when you need to pack up and go out the door in a jiffy. The last thing you want is a bag without snacks for a hungry toddler!
8. Don’t beat yourself up if your kids eat breakfast for dinner sometimes – oatmeal, a healthy omelette, egg sandwiches…….you’re doing the best that you can!
9. Keep take-away menus in a set drawer for those emergency days when you cannot even lift a finger to heat up food – Dominos Pizza, Room Service Menu, Pizza Hut, Nandos, McDonalds.
10. Get older kids to help in the kitchen. They will love it and you will save a bit of time - http://mamapumpkin.com/2011/getting-kids-to-help-in-the-kitchen/

Chauffeuring
Unless you have a driver, you’re going to have to do the school run all by yourself as well, on top of all the ten thousand work tasks you have to accomplish within any given day. As for me, I have to drive my elder daughter for her extra-curriculur activities and pick her up from school every day with a toddler in tow. I also have to bring the younger one for classes several times a week.

1. Keep activities close to home. With KL traffic, it really isn’t worth driving more than 20 minutes for any child activity.
2. Keep your car stocked with snacks, music and kiddy entertainment. It will double up as your child’s play room and your mobile on the go office! Make sure you have a Blackberry Bold with Blackberry services. I’ve already mastered the art of typing without looking at the phone ala Helen Keller! An iPhone would never work for this purpose.
3. Keep things simple. Your child really does not need 5 activities to fill up her time and be happy. The rule of thumb for extra-curriculur activities is to participate in one creative activity and one physical activity. We do piano, swimming, tae-kwon-do and soccer, so we’ve already broken THAT rule but 2 of those activities happen over the weekend when work is less busy.
4. Work whilst you’re waiting in the car instead of gossiping with school Moms.
5. Car pool with trusted parents from school. In my case, nobody lives in my area *pout*.

Phone Calls
As much as you plan when to make your business phone calls, don’t forget that people will call you too. Sometimes, it’s so difficult getting in touch with someone that when they call you back, you don’t want to miss it! But what if the call comes at the worst times? Like when you’re driving, or about to put your child to sleep, or when you’re bathing your child, or cooking? And what if really, there isn’t any other time to take a call but now?

1. Invest in a MOBILE PHONE HANDS FREE KIT. A phone with a loudspeaker is NOT good enough because you really need BOTH your hands on the wheel, especially when you’re driving with a child. This will allow you to take the call whilst you’re driving but do this only if you can multi-task and won’t get lost in the process! If your child starts acting up, tell the caller, you will call him back.
2. If you’re in the midst of doing anything with your child and an important call comes in, answer it, but if it looks like it’s going to take longer than a few minutes, then tell the caller that you will call him back.

Getting Organized
By keeping all your things in designated locations (nail clippers, hair brushes, hats, bags, phones, keys, whatever), you will never waste another minute looking for things. Don’t you just hate it when you suddenly need to rush out and can’t find what you’re looking for? Me neither. As a working Mom without help, every millisecond counts as useful time. It all adds up. More importantly, if you have a toddler like me, make sure important things are all kept OUT OF REACH. Many a time, we’ve wasted hours just searching for keys and remote controls only to find them in the bedroom trash or inside her play kitchen oven.

Time Management
PLAN – PLAN – PLAN!!!! There is really nothing more to it, apart from training yourself to work super fast at everything from typing to talking to walking to chopping onions to ironing and folding laundry……..just imagine yourself as a New York high speed electric train meeting a deadline and practice moving with speed to perfection. As for the laundry and house cleaning, outsource it if you can. I pay my husband to do it!

Accept also, that there just simply isn’t time for everything so you will need to DECIDE. Prioritize every single detail in your life, compartmentalize and catalogue all areas and it will all lead back to PLANNING AHEAD. Be ruthless with saying no to birthday parties, or anything else that will snatch time away from you. You cannot afford it right now.

Distracting the toddler
If you have a toddler who hardly sleeps (mine sleeps an hour a day nap if I’m lucky), then you’ll need to find ways to distract her so that she will keep herself entertained whilst you work. Of course, when and if she does nap, it is your cue to jump on the work train and drive it to maximum capacity. After caring for all your child’s basic needs, you will need to find ways to keep her entertained whilst she isn’t asleep. Train her first and foremost to enjoy her own company by leaving her alone to play by herself. Bring out the emergency distractions when she gets restless. It can be anything from your wallet (my toddler’s favourite!), to your make up box, to a small plastic drawer case filled with hair accessories to cutlery and crockery from the kitchen, to clean laundry. Whatever it takes, allow your toddler to make that mess as long as it allows you to work. You can always pick it up once work is done.

Attending Meetings with Kids
If you can help it, get someone else to follow you to the meeting so that that person can act as your backup babysitter should your child get restless and want to leave the room for a little adventure. Explain to the person(s) you are meeting that your child will be coming and apologise in advance for this. Have a few back up plans should your toddler get restless – bribe them with chocolate or their favourite cookie, bring three distraction tools (I find that toys rarely work for my toddler who is more interested in day to day gadgets, or books) and if all else fails, make the most of your multi-tasking skills of listening and talking coherently whilst keeping an eye on your roaming toddler. I was actually forced to do this just last week and it was very hard! Lucky me that it was a successful meeting! It certainly helps if your child is full of cuteness! People are more forgiving………phew!

Keep what is important close
It is easy to swirl out of control when one is thrown into this kind of challenge but the way to stay sane is to still fit in the things that are important to you like exercise and spending quality time with the kids. So what if there is a layer of dust on the TV, you’ll get there eventually. Sprinkle a bit of romance in, even if it is just that 10 minute long hug with your partner; connect with a friend, even if it’s just a phone call or a text conversation; take time to breathe. Make time to breathe. And tell yourself that you’re doing this for a better cause. It will all be worth it.

Most importantly, a great positive attitude and a kick-ass sense of humour will take you very, very far.

Here’s wishing all of you mothers reading this a very blessed Happy Mother’s Day and a special prayer goes out to you that it will get better, whatever better is. May warm sunshine descend upon your soul, may the laughter of your children tickle your heart and may you be blessed with lots and lots of love to take another five billion tall steps in this journey of Motherhood.

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