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From hospital to home

The baby room is ready, with baby’s musical mobile hanging at the new cot, diapers neatly stacked in a corner, baby toiletries and towels in a little handy basket, flashcards and baby books on the reading table.

You have read books on baby care and post-partum challenges and have spent your whole pregnancy visualizing coming home with baby. Yet, nothing will quite prepare you for the whirlwind of events and emotions when you bring your little bundle home.

An old photograph taken 15 years ago when I had my firstborn says it all – while my facial expression was of utter delight, the look in my eyes, my guarded step as I stepped out of the hospital door with baby in my arms reflected someone who felt as if she was walking on the moon for the first time. That moment, captured in time, epitomizes the feelings and bewilderment of every new mother. While the sun still shines, birds still chirp and people still go about their everyday business, a woman knows her life has been changed forever now that she is a mother.

The first thing you discover is how much needs to be done. No matter how prepared most parents think they are, they are often surprised to find that there is always something that needs attending to from the moment baby is born.

If you are expecting a new baby soon, here is a guide to help you get through the first few bewildering days of motherhood (but remember, there’s always something else that might pop up any time).

At the hospital:

• For normal deliveries without complications, mother and baby are usually discharged by the next day. If you or your baby is suspected of having an infection or any complications, you may be retained for observation for another 2 or 3 days. Mothers who deliver via C-section will need about 3 days to recuperate before being discharged.
• After birth, whether normal or C-section, it is advisable to get up and walk about to get your blood flow going. But bear in mind not to overdo it; lie or sit down if you feel dizzy or faint.
• Your baby will usually be brought to you within the first hour to be breastfed. Some hospitals provide a baby cart so that baby can sleep alongside your bed. Others keep all babies in baby nurseries so that mothers can get some rest.
• The next morning, the nurses will send your baby over to be breastfed before whisking baby off for a bath. Baby will be powdered and dressed, ready to be brought home (unless you or baby needs to be retained for monitoring).
• Before you can leave, you will need to get discharge documents from the hospital after settling your hospital bills. Keep these documents carefully as they will be needed for your baby’s registration at the National Registry Department.

When you reach home:

• The first thing you would need to do is to find a comfortable and conducive spot to breastfeed. Some mothers prefer to nurse sitting up, while some prefer to lie on their sides. You need to know your favourite position before deciding where you want to breastfeed.
• The first few days at home may be unsettling – you either have a baby that cries all the time, or sleeps all the time. Either way can induce high anxiety in many a new mother. Sleeping a lot is usually normal. Some amount of crying can be expected when baby is hungry, wet, too cold or hot or simply uncomfortable. It is an emergency only when the crying appears abnormally distressed or is incessant.
• You may find your body aching a few spots but that is a normal part of healing. You might even experience acute “labour” pain which is actually your uterus shrinking back to its normal size.
• If you have had an episiotomy, it may help to get a child’s swim ring to sit on. Keep your episiotomy area clean and dry to help speed its healing. Take lots of liquids and fibre-rich foods to avoid constipation which will hurt your wound when you exert to pass motion.
• Friends and relatives may be excited to see your baby – have the courage to say “no” if you don’t feel like entertaining. This is your official time to rest!

The first month:

• Wondering why you didn’t fall in love with your baby at first sight? Don’t worry, not all moms do! You’ll find yourself warming up to baby after spending more time together.
• You will need another pair of hands for various reasons, whether to prepare meals, do the laundry, clean the house, wash baby napkins, etc. If your family members are not able to help out, get a friend, hire domestic help or a confinement lady. This will leave you more time to take care of yourself as well as baby.
• It is easier to room in with baby for the next few months for as long as he or she is being breastfed. Sleeping with baby means you don’t need to get out of bed to breastfeed, which gives you more sleep time.
• If you’re getting back to work after confinement, it’s a good time to start expressing breast milk to be stored in the freezer. Remember to tag each bottle with the date of storage so that the first bottle in is the first one out.
• Towards the end of the month, you will need to establish a schedule to avoid the mad rush when you start work again. If necessary, do a trial run to know how long it takes to get ready in the mornings.

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